


3:21

by BlondeCanary



Category: Arrow (TV 2012)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-27
Updated: 2016-04-27
Packaged: 2018-06-04 20:22:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,240
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6674254
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BlondeCanary/pseuds/BlondeCanary
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After Laurel was attacked, Nyssa has trouble sleeping</p>
            </blockquote>





	3:21

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first fanfiction for this pairing so please be nice, I'm very nervous! Also, English isn't my first language. Hope you'll enjoy :)

They were in Laurel's bed, light sheets clinging to their intertwined bodies. The attorney was lying on top of her. Heavy, quiet and warm. Her slow breathing was lulling, and yet Nyssa could not sleep. Instead, she lazily ran her hands along the blonde's back, carressing every inch of soft skin, each time a little lower, until her arms were too small for her to keep going. Then, dropping a trail of kisses on Laurel's shoulder, she closed her eyes and thought about the events of the last forty-eight hours. 

She had learned from Oliver what had happened to Laurel. He had called her with Laurel's phone while she was in surgery. She should not have been surprised that he knew of her presence in Star City. After disbanding the League, she had tried to leave, to find a new purpose to her life. She had traveled, seen friends – or at least acquaintances – and met new people, and it had worked, for a while. But everything brought her back here. 

There was Merlyn, of course. The thought that the man – if he deserved such a label – who had taken so many things from her and who had hurt so many others that she knew, for no other reason than an unquenchable thirst for power, was alive... It drove her crazy. But the truth was that he was just an excuse for her to come back. He was not the reason behind her watching over Team Arrow several nights a week. Nor did he cause her presence outside a certain block of flats on the nights she felt the loneliest.

What was more surprising was that Oliver had not told anyone, not even her blonde (now certainly more than) friend. Maybe he understood her need to be alone for a little while, to remain in the shadows a little longer, to find herself without losing Laurel. Or maybe he was just doing the same thing as always: not telling people things. It did not matter anymore. She could not have lasted much longer without reaching out to her anyway.

She tightened her hold around the sleeping blonde. The memories after that were kind of blury. She could barely remember barging into the hospital, not caring that every wall she had tried to build between her mind and her feelings was falling apart and that everyone could see it happening. Laurel's friends were already there and she had understood from their looks how serious the situation was. No one had said much but Nyssa had felt accepted, sharing a same silent sorrow.

And suddenly there she had been, the Laurel she had sworn herself to protect, whom she had been watching over from a distance these past few weeks – telling herself that Laurel did not need her in her life – she lay in a hospital bed, barely alive. 

But alive. Her face paler than she had ever seen it and make-up free. Her gorgeous body beaten and clad in this hideous hospital gown. But alive, and smiling. Obviously, she was one of those people who wake up smiling after nearing death and ask you if you are alright. 

The whole team had expressed their relief to see her alive and their love for her and Nyssa had sent Oliver a look that meant “Please, leave us”. And he had, with a knowing grin. And that was when she had torn up. She had sat down on the hospital bed and taken one of Laurel's hands between her own trembling fingers. Of course, it had been Laurel, the one who had almost died a few hours earlier, who had comforted her and hugged her, for the first time. And then she had fallen asleep, exhausted by one of the toughest days in her already tough life.

Nyssa had felt a little relieved then. It meant that they would not have to talk just yet, not until Laurel was awake and fully herself. Nyssa had run to the hospital without thinking about anything else than her need for Laurel to be alive. But once she had been reassured, she could feel her resolve waver more and more every second. She had spent the whole night trying to come up with excuses to hide her feelings.

That had changed the minute the blonde had awakened and given her one of her dazzling smiles, thankful but intrigued by the fact that Nyssa was still there. Nyssa had taken her hand, once again, but couldn't bring herself to say the words. After a minute or so of the most intimate silence of her life, Laurel had asked her if they had ever really been friends and then motioned for her to come closer until their lips had met.

Content, Nyssa moved a little between the sheets to pull Laurel impossibly closer and finally let sleep overcome her.

Suddenly, she opened her eyes and was greeted by a dark, empty room. She slowly took in her surroundings, trying to process what was happening. She was still in Laurel's bed but there was no one in her arms. And there would never be.

Closing her eyes again, she let the truth sink in. Laurel was dead. Oliver had warned her but she had arrived too late and the blonde was already gone. There had been no last moments, no smiles, and definitely no kisses between them. Nothing for this strong woman who, after everything she had gone through, deserved to die in someone's arms.

Now feeling more angry than sad, Nyssa sat up and grabbed the first object she found, ready to throw it to the nearest wall.

It was the mask. Laurel's mask. Slowly, she unclenched her fist but kept the small accessory in her hand, finally giving up the fight against the sob that was swelling in her throat.

After a while – she did not know exactly how long – she looked at the clock. 3:21. With a hopeless sigh, she sat back against the headboard. Of all the times she had imagined herself lying in this bed – and that was quite a handful of times – she had never thought it would happen on such an occasion, and she had never thought she would have to lie alone between Laurel's sheets. 

She put her face in her hands and wondered how she would get through this day. And she did not even want to think about the next ones, those when Laurel would be buried once and for all and she would have to get used to life without her. 

She heard a sharp intake of breath in the adjacent room and realized that Thea could not sleep either. Thea who had had to come back to an empty apartment on that night and who too would have to get used to life without the woman she considered her big sister.

Looking at the mask still in her hand, she made her decision. She would stand with those who had loved Laurel and bring down the one who had taken her away from them, wearing this mask with pride. And after that.... She did not know. Not yet. But she did not need to think about it now. There was already so much to do. 

She lied back on the bed and closed her eyes. There were still a few hours until she would have to get up, get dressed and leave with Thea for the cemetery.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm so sorry about the ending but I couldn't help it. This image of the two of them lying in bed kept popping up in my head after the episode but there was also that part of my mind that had to remind me every time that Laurel was dead (it still hasn't sunk in) so this is me putting this internal conflict on paper and trying to come to terms with her death. Also, Oliver is NOT the love of her life. Please leave comments, I still have happier ideas in store!


End file.
